Sunday 8 February 2009

WHITE WOODEN OIL

a re-post of my old blog page of Aug 2008 to this new blog page just in case it disappear into thin air..
http://aaronmoseskimbins.blog.friendster.com/2008/08/white-wooden-oil/

WHITE WOODEN OIL

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THERE IS NOT A GREAT ABUNDANCE OF CHILI IN MILAN CITY FIRST OF ALL.. THE AVERAGE MALE WHEN FACE WITH EVIDENCE OF HIS INCREASING STOMACH IN THE MIRROR , WILL TEND EITHER TO INVEST IN MORE GENEROUSLY CUT PAIR OF TROUSERS OR TO BUY A NEW MIRROR, WHILE HIS FEMALE COUNTERPART SEEMS TO BE GENETICALLY PROGRAMMED TO SLENDERNESS, AT LEAST UN TILL HER WEDDING DAY (SORRY HONEY..BUT U CANT KEEP BUYING NEW LARGER CLOTHES IN THE FUTURE OK..)
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Pict0104 AFTER A LONG MONTH OF BEACH HOLIDAYING MARATHON, IM FINALLY BACK TO MY SELF-MADE MTV CRIB HERE IN MILAN..(MY HOME FOR THE PAST 5 YEARS).. OHH HOW I MISSED THE SMELL OF MY PIG STY, INCH THICK OF DUSTY TEAK FURNITURES, MY ALL-YOU-CAN-FIND IN A HOUSE ALL IN MY RATHER LARGE COZY ROOM, MY COMFY 120CM HIGH BED, THE 4 TVS, FAVORITE STUDY TABLE FUNCTION ALSO AS MY BREAKFAST CORNER TABLE AND DINNER TABLE, MINI LIBRARY, MY LEGOs, MINIATURE BIKES AND MY COMPANION-MY CLASSIC WOODEN 6 STRINGS MUSICAL INSTRUMENT….WHAT ELSE CAN I ASK FOR TO GET CONTENTED LIVING HERE ALL ALONE FOR ALL THESE YEARS?.. STILL WISHED I COULD PUT A CINEMA IN HERE..
Pict0032 IMMEDIATELY, I SWUNG TO MY KITCHEN.. WHATS FOR DINNER? RICE FOR SURE, HADNT HAD THEM FOR 33 DAYS STRAIGHT,.. SOMETHING SIMPLE I THOUGHT… DEEP FRIED ITALIAN SALSICA (MINCED MEATMIXED WITH SOMETHING I DONT WANT TO KNOW STUFFED AND PRESSED INTO ANIMAL INTESTINES TO FORM LIKE-A-SAUSAGE..) LOW FIRE IN EXTRA VIRGIN OLIVE OIL AND A GULP OF WHITE WINE.. NEED TO HAVE ALSO A BOWL OF HALVED CHERRY TOMATOES TO ENSURE SMOOTH DESCEND OF DRIED WHITE RICE DOWN THE THROAT INTO STOMACH..(GOT NOT TIME TO MAKE SOUP AYAM BAH) SUN WAS BEGINNING TO SET AS THE CLOCK ON WALL INDICATES 20TH HOUR OF THAT DAY..THEN… CAME MY ONLY FRIENDS.. THE MOSQUITOES !!!! DAMM!!!.. WHERE D THEY COME FROM SUDDENLY? IN ALL DIRECTIONS LAGI TU, I WAS UNDER ATTACK !! BITES FROM ANKLES UP ALL THE WAY TO THE BACK OF MY EARS.. ARRGHHH!!!!!
Pict0173 AS I FIRED UP THE PAN TO MAKE CRISPS LAYERS ON SALSICA BEFORE SERVING, I JUST COULD NOT TAKE THE BITES AND ITCHINESS ANYMORE.., I SPRINTED ACROSS THE LIVING ROOM TOWARDS MY STUDY TABLE LEAVING M Y ALMOST BURNT DINNER,.. LIGHTS I NEEDED NOT FOR I KNOW THE WAY, THE CURVES AND THE ANGLES INTO MY ATTIC-LIKE ROOM,.. WITH AN ARM ,IN TOTAL DARKNESS, I DOG-SEARCHED FOR SOMETHING TO SOOTH THE BITES.., GOT IT !! AS MY BRAIN SIGNALS ME THAT THE SMALL LONG BOTTLE IN MY HAND IS WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR OR ACTUALLY WANTED…(”MINYAK KAYU PUTIH”….ALMOST LIKE MINYAK CAP KAPAK..).. WITHOUT HESITATION, I UN TAPPED IT AND BEGAN SPLASHING IT ON TO MY PALM RUBBING VIGOROUSLY STARTING FROM ANKLE TO THE OTHER ALL THE WAY UP ABOVE THE KNEES.., FOR A MOMENT I THOUGHT WHY THE SPIRIT ODOR HAS NOT ARRIVE TO MY SMELLING SENSES YET…RUBBING IT OFF MY MIND I CONTINUED ON (REMEMBER GUYS, THIS ALL HAPPENED IN TOTAL DARKNESS).. SPLASHING AND PALMING BOTH MY ARMS WITH THE THEN THOUGHT TO BE MINYAK KAYU PUTIH…I KNEW ALSO THAT MY BRAIN REGISTERED A PEPPER AND VINEGAR SMELL BUT AGAIN I SIMPLY IGNORED IT..SPLASHING EVEN MORE BEHIND AROUND MY NECK (I WAS GETTING BETTER ON IT IN THE DARK .. OOW!! I EVEN SAID..) MY THEN BURNT DINNER WAS ALREADY CALLING FOR HELP..

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THATS WHEN SUDDENLY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE I THOUGHT I COULD SEE IN THE DARK, I PRESSED CLOSELY MY PALM AGAINST MY KADAZAN NOSE, I COULD ALMOST TASTE IT… OHH MY GOAT!!!! I CRIED.. WHAT I HAD IN MY HAND WAS NOT THE MINYAK KAYU PUTIH…., BUT INSTEAD A BOTTLE SEEMED SO SIMILAR IN SHAPE OR FELT LIKE WHAT IT THOUGHT IT WAS.., WAS ACTUALLY A BOTTLE OF ”TABASCO” ….. EVEN LOUDER AAAARRGGHH!! THIS TIME…I HURRIEDLY DIVED INTO THE BATH TUB AND SWORE IN SILENCE THINKING WAS IT SILLY OR JUST FUNNY… ISH ISH ISH !!…

MORAL OF THE STORY IS … TIDY UP YOUR STUDY DESK…

SO I HAD TO GET NEW TABASCO… ALMOST FINISH OOH… SSSHHHH…

MUST CHECK OUT THIS PHOTO DOWN HERE.. SEE FOR YOUR SELVES...

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4 Responses to “WHITE WOODEN OIL”

  1. McRae Says:
    August 23rd, 2008 at 6:18 pm

    bah..like me..i too can walk in total darkness in my home..but have never mistaken anything so disastrous yet..kasian kau….

  2. CATWOMAN Says:
    August 24th, 2008 at 7:08 am

    KOTOH!!!!!

    hahaha.

  3. VSK YoRK Says:
    August 24th, 2008 at 11:48 am

    hihihi…budu…

  4. Fressi Says:
    August 26th, 2008 at 8:12 am

    ahyooooo…u didnt pay el bill ka? manala sama size itu white wooden oil dgn tu sos lada orang italy?? satu tinggi satu pendek….nextime pakai torchlite o lilin bah…luckily (o unluckily) u didnt splash to ur face..